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Wednesday, February 13, 2008 at Wednesday, February 13, 2008

Sigh... things just won't go right.. >< while school is going to end i was in the class.. i went out awhile and i saw her.. then i came back to the class then i kept looking outside.. i stand up and kept looking outside.. hoping that she can see me.. or better yet hoping i can see her.. =/

after school i was infront of her.. i don't know.. i felt like im just a wooden block that is blocking her way... then she walks away.. *grabs heart* i knew she was busy.. i knew.. aih~ i wait for her awhile even after i say i'm going off.. then i asked her that why like she don't even know me.. she was really busy.. i knew le.. i knew.. =( then she walked real fast.. and i hurry went up too.. thought just to say bye.. she ran so fast and i went up.. can't see her.. i don't see her anywhere.. ='( until i went back down.. i saw her coming down the stairs.. then i just say im off now..

aih~ its my fault le.. knowing shes busy all the time.. i'd still keep blocking her.. >< sorry dear.. i'm really sorry.. i just wish i could be noticed..

I wish i was as invisible as you make me feel.. but its not her fault.. its just me kept thinking like that.. i really don't know what else to explain to make people to understand how i feel.. i really can't.. ='(

我是不是很傻...? =/ keep thinking negative.. but i really did think positive so much.. i really din think anything bad.. just made me feel sad.. whatever i do.. i do it not just for myself.. but for you too.. no matter what i'm doing if anything happen to her.. i would be right beside her no matter what! i really don't know.. I really gave everything i have to her.. i put her first in my whole life.. i take this thing so real.. i'm not playing a love game.. i just want to live and be happy with her forever.. i never even ONCE thought we would end any soon.. thats why its for real..

我是很没用?=/ i've already done my best... and its not enough.. everytime when she needs me.. I've REALLY tried my best put down EVERYTHING and just concentrate on her!!! when she sms me.. call me or wad.. i PUT DOWN EVERYTHING!!! I don't even care if its so damn important that has to do with my life or what! ='( i really did my best dear.. can u see? ='(

I'm down on my knees... praying to God that everyday you'll be happy.. and i'd be happy together with you.. i just want to be like the normal couple.. being together happy holding hands never letting go..

valentines is tomorrow.. sigh.. i just hope at least just for tomorrow we'll be very happy just for once.. ='( i'm gonna give you something.. this thing i really wanted to help you to wear it.. but.. knowing i don't know when is the 'next time' we could go out together.. so i had no choice but just to give it to you like that..

i just pray.. please.. i just want both of us being happy.. anything tell each other.. solve it together.. Never hiding anything from each other.. i love you and i really meant it from the bottom of my heart.. i want to carry you up and i won't let you down..

<3 i just hope <3

You're my angel of music. ♥